Stupid Internet Joke of the Day

Started by whitetailfan, August 30, 2005, 04:07:12 PM

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whitetailfan

Free Sex
A gas station in <s>Mississippi</s> <font color="red">Arkansas</font id="red">[;)]was trying to increase its sales, so the owner put up a sign saying
<font size="3"><font color="blue">Free Sex with Fill-Up</font id="blue"></font id="size3">

Soon a local redneck pulled in, filled his tank, and then asked for his free sex.  The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. If he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex.  The redneck guessed 8, and the proprietor said, "You were close.  The number was 7.  Sorry, no sex this time."

A week later, the same redneck, along with his buddy, Bubba, pulled in for a fill-up.  Again he asked for his free sex.  The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number.  The redneck guessed 2 this time.  Again the proprietor said, "Sorry, it was 4. You were close, but no free sex this time."

As they were driving away, the redneck said to his buddy, "I think that game is rigged and he doesn't really give away free sex."
Bubba replied, "No, it ain't rigged Billy Ray.  My wife won twice last week."


<font color="green">whitetailfan</font id="green">
"Nice Rack"
Lethbridge, AB
Vegetarian is an ancient aboriginal word meaning "lousy hunter"
We have enough youth...how about a fountain of smart?
Living a healthy lifestyle is simply choosing to die at the slowest possible rate.

MallardWacker

I know us Arkies have a low road to hoe but I do believe that should stay in MS.  We are more into the non forking tree thing than just giving it up for gas.  And yesi do get it....

White you'd be the man.

Speaking of White, I have been thinking of you lately.  Had one of the nicest two year old bucks I ever had in my back yard yesterday.  Very nice 8pt, nice wide symmetrical spread.  Been having a 3 sets of Doe and Fawns.  One has a pair of fawns that still have their spots, the others are quite a bit older with no spots....Had one set come up with in ten yards of my sleeping Lab, it seem to bother neither of them.


SmokeOn,

mski
Perryville, Arkansas
Wooo-Pig-Soooie

If a man says he knows anything at all, he knows nothing what he aught to know.  But...


SmokeOn,

Mike
Perryville, Arkansas

It's not how much you smoke but how many friends you make while doing it...

Oldman

G1 too funny~~!

Only a person from Arkansas could think of this ... from the State where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this true story.
Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Arkansas.

After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine, dry summer night) flicked the blinkers on, then off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patron vehicles left.

At last, the parking lot was empty, he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the road.

The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, and promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyzer test. To his amazement the breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken." "I doubt it," said the truly proud Arkansas' man. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."


Olds


Click On The Portal To Be Transported To Our Time Tested And Proven Recipes~~!!! 

MallardWacker

I could see that happening....[:)][:)]


SmokeOn,

mski
Perryville, Arkansas
Wooo-Pig-Soooie

If a man says he knows anything at all, he knows nothing what he aught to know.  But...


SmokeOn,

Mike
Perryville, Arkansas

It's not how much you smoke but how many friends you make while doing it...

whitetailfan

[:D][:D]lmao[:D][:D]


<font color="green">whitetailfan</font id="green">
"Nice Rack"
Lethbridge, AB
Vegetarian is an ancient aboriginal word meaning "lousy hunter"
We have enough youth...how about a fountain of smart?
Living a healthy lifestyle is simply choosing to die at the slowest possible rate.