SCHOOL -- 1958 vs. 2008
Scenario:
Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1958
- Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2008
- School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to
jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for
traumatized students and teachers.
Scenario :
Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1958
- Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2008 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.
Scenario:
Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.
1958
- Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2008 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.
Scenario:
Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1958 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2008 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.
Scenario :
Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1958 - Mark shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2008 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.
Scenario:
Pedro fails high school English.
1958 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2008 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.
Scenario:
Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1958 - Ants die.
2008- BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.
Scenario:
Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary.. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1958 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2008 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.
Kinda makes ya go... hmmmmm....
Mike
Kinda sad how things have changed "For the Better" isn't it?
It is a joke, Mike, but the kind of joke that makes you cry versus one that makes you laugh.
I often wonder how in the world I survived as a kid on car trips. I was never buckled in and often fell asleep in the back of the station wagon. Today, you get a ticket for not wearing a seat belt and investigated for child neglect if they're not in a prescribed car seat right up until the time they reach a certain weight.
It's usually a case of paralysis by analysis that is a ruin of many things.
Quote from: Smoking Duck on March 12, 2009, 09:01:56 AM
It is a joke, Mike, but the kind of joke that makes you cry versus one that makes you laugh.
I often wonder how in the world I survived as a kid on car trips. I was never buckled in and often fell asleep in the back of the station wagon. Today, you get a ticket for not wearing a seat belt and investigated for child neglect if they're not in a prescribed car seat right up until the time they reach a certain weight.
It's usually a case of paralysis by 0ysis that is a ruin of many things.
H. E. Double Hockey Sticks, we used to go everywhere in the bed of a pickup - oftentimes while sitting on the rails! and I'm not going to tell ya what we did with bottle rockets - shhh probably still being investigated. Or the time going around the Sonic - a Ray Stevens song gave us the idea. If you need more of a word picture - ya ain't gettin' one! And wouldn't want one!!!!
Shakespeare
The Bard of Hot Aire
Threadkiller Extraordinaire'
Those comparisons really make you grit your teeth. I never thought of ADD drugs as an excuse for extra school money, but wonder if that's accurate. There was a Sopranos episode where Tony and Carmella are called into school to discuss AJ's behavior (and potential ADD). After hearing the flap, Tony responds that he's a growing boy who is doing things that growing boys do. I'm sure that most of my friends and I would have put on that stuff if we'd have been raised nowadays.
Our little boy is getting quite active, climbing over, under, or through anything providing the opportunity. I keep reminding my wife that its "the nature" of things. I didn't explain to her what that nature would mean with respect to:
Fireworks of any type. Or any combustible material for that matter.
lawn darts (if they even make them still).
dart guns, bb guns, heck anything that launches a projectile.
Anything that provides an opportunity to sail through the air, whether a mattress, trampoline, jump (bike, ski or otherwise), diving board or rooftop.
Thanks for the trip down memory lane.
Consig;
Believe me, I'm talking from experience, lawn darts tend to make you do stupid things. ;D
I thought they were taken off the market, but last summer I saw them advertised somewheres.
Lawn darts was good fun - and so handy - anytime you needed more ventilation in the roof of your house or the roof of your parent's car, or even if you wanted a lobotomy.....
Shakespeare
The Bard of Hot Aire
Threadkiller Extraordinaire'
Lawn Darts ( I believe they were actually called "Jarts", if I'm not mistaken) were great fun until you introduced alcohol into the equation.
Then they became a blast ;D
Quote from: Smoking Duck on March 12, 2009, 05:41:59 PM
Lawn Darts ( I believe they were actually called "Jarts", if I'm not mistaken) were great fun until you introduced alcohol into the equation.
Then they became a blast ;D
Now that brings to mind an afternoon of drinking and a box full of Roman candles. (By the way Flannel shirts should never be worn during a Roman candle fight at 30 yards. It looks really cool if you aint the one wearing it. Looks kinda like a propane/ceramic heater when it starts up.)
Quote from: Tenpoint5 on March 12, 2009, 06:46:29 PM
Now that brings to mind an afternoon of drinking and a box full of Roman candles. (By the way Flannel shirts should never be worn during a Roman candle fight at 30 yards. It looks really cool if you aint the one wearing it. Looks kinda like a propane/ceramic heater when it starts up.)
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Quote from: Habanero Smoker on March 12, 2009, 02:20:08 PM
Consig;
Believe me, I'm talking from experience, lawn darts tend to make you do stupid things. ;D
I thought they were taken off the market, but last summer I saw them advertised somewheres.
Habs, I know that of which you speak, and carry physical evidence on my left shin.
I did manage to avoid catching fire in the fireworks wars, the estes rocket combustible payload experiments, and the tennis ball canon tests.
Not the tennis ball cannon tests! :o
I thought we were the only ones dumb enough to...
:D :D :D ;D
Mike
Quote1958 vs. 2008
Is so true.
A sad state of affairs today.
Ladies and Gentlemen,
How did we all survive when we were younger? :o :o :o
And how many lawsuits did you hear of back then dealing with the injuries? :)
How many of you can remember shooting carbide in a paint can??
Quote from: hillbillysmoker on March 21, 2009, 03:02:51 PM
How many of you can remember shooting carbide in a paint can??
I've never done that. I do remember back in the early 60's shooting old car batteries to watch them explode. Wow! That must have been real good for the environment. :-[
Quote from: josbocc on March 21, 2009, 02:31:20 PM
Ladies and Gentlemen,
How did we all survive when we were younger? :o :o :o
Personally, most people avoided my pimply a..ss.. like the plauge...lol
Guess that was my wakeup call that I was not the shallow end of the gene pool...
Do I hear a whistle..? Nope, that's my ribs tellin' me they are done...
In a similar vein as the original post of this thread
THE GRASSHOPPER AND THE ANT
CLASSIC VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies alone, out in the cold.
THE END
THE UNITED STATES VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. So far, so good, eh?
Then, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like him, are cold and starving.
The CNN shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper, with cuts to a video of the ant in his comfortable warm home with a table laden with food.
Americans are stunned that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so while others have plenty.
The Citizens for the Rights of the Poor demonstrate in front of the ant's house.
In response to polls, the President drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti-Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant's taxes are reassessed, and he is also fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as helpers.
Without enough money to pay both the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government. The ant moves to India and starts a successful agri-biz company.
The CNN later shows the now fat grasshopper finishing up the last of the ant's food, though Spring is still months away, while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to maintain it.
Inadequate government funding is blamed, Barney Frank is appointed to head a commission of inquiry that will cost $10,000,000.
The grasshopper is soon dead of a drug overdose; the New York Time blames it on the obvious failure of the former Republican Government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity.
The abandoned house is taken over by a gang of immigrant spiders, praised by the government for enriching the U.S.'s multicultural diversity. They promptly set up a marijuana grow-op and terrorize the community.
THE END
Good one Caney!!! :D ;)
Quote from: Caneyscud on March 12, 2009, 04:20:12 PM
Lawn darts was good fun - and so handy - anytime you needed more ventilation in the roof of your house or the roof of your parent's car, or even if you wanted a lobotomy.....
Shakespeare
The Bard of Hot Aire
Threadkiller Extraordinaire'
I drink to keep sane,
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me
than have a frontle lobotomy :P