Take a break and have a laugh

[Oldman]

First place winner:
1. When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach , California , would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.....

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And now, the honorable mentions:

2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

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3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

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4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

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5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

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6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer...$15. (If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?)

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7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder-block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder-block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder-block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.

[LilSmoker]

Haha! those are priceless Olds!  ;D ;)

[manxman]

Haha, good ones..... think 1 and 4 are my favourites!  ;)

[car54]

Here is is real personal dumb crook story for me.  The other month there was a drug deal that had gone bad on the street where I work. They got out of their cars and started shooting at each other. 1 person was hit in the arm. They both sped away leaving the dope in the middle of the street. Now all of this happened in front of a television station with some very large and visible security cameras. It was all caught on tape including the license plate #'s.

Brad

[Wildcat]

People that use and sell drugs have never been very intellegent IMHO.  I live just North of I-10 and the runners are always being caught by driving 85 - 90 MPH in a 75 MPH zone.

[NePaSmoKer]

Those are great Olds


nepas

[whitetailfan]

I don't know if its the same as the #7 dude, but I got one of those forwarded e-mails with a movie clip of just that happening.  Guy tries to a smash a window of some building and gets a bounce back right in the noodle.