Funny story of the day

[Up In Smoke]

Manx, that is like touching an electric fence to see if it was on!

Caney,
it's funny you would mention that.
I was born and raised in Wild Wonderful West Virginia.
When i was 12 my brother took me rabbit hunting on my brother in laws property.
On the very back of his property was an empty farm house with about 20 acres of manicured (sort of) pasture.
the pasture (still surrounded by an electric fence) had grown up a bit and was perfect for brush bustin'
after a long morning trek through the woods and busting briar patches it started to rain, and i mean really big drops.....
the kind of rain that will soak you before you get 5 good steps.
As we were running through the pasture to get to the porch of this farm house we came up to the electric fence, not realizing my
brother in law had just made repairs to the fence and turned it on, i grabbed it to raise it up so my brother could get under it,
needless to say it just about took me out of my shorts. my brother (who was laughing too hard to knock me off of the fence)
told me as i picked myself up that i was doing the sparky dance for about 15 seconds.
man was i mad at him for laughing.........BUT!!!!! in his infinite wisdom he quickly grabbed a stick from the ground (a very wet stick)
and attempted to raise the fence so i could go under.....I wet my pants, it seems that the sparky dance was funny after all!

[classicrockgriller]

Manx, that is like touching an electric fence to see if it was on!

Caney,
it's funny you would mention that.
I was born and raised in Wild Wonderful West Virginia.
When i was 12 my brother took me rabbit hunting on my brother in laws property.
On the very back of his property was an empty farm house with about 20 acres of manicured (sort of) pasture.
the pasture (still surrounded by an electric fence) had grown up a bit and was perfect for brush bustin'
after a long morning trek through the woods and busting briar patches it started to rain, and i mean really big drops.....
the kind of rain that will soak you before you get 5 good steps.
As we were running through the pasture to get to the porch of this farm house we came up to the electric fence, not realizing my
brother in law had just made repairs to the fence and turned it on, i grabbed it to raise it up so my brother could get under it,
needless to say it just about took me out of my shorts. my brother (who was laughing too hard to knock me off of the fence)
told me as i picked myself up that i was doing the sparky dance for about 15 seconds.
man was i mad at him for laughing.........BUT!!!!! in his infinite wisdom he quickly grabbed a stick from the ground (a very wet stick)
and attempted to raise the fence so i could go under.....I wet my pants, it seems that the sparky dance was funny after all!

Not laughing at you UIS, laughing with you! That's funny!

[standles]

Think grabbing one is bad...     I accidentally peed on one while deer hunting one time.    It was spring before the feller worked up enough nerve to come back out.

[Up In Smoke]

Think grabbing one is bad...     I accidentally peed on one while deer hunting one time.    It was spring before the feller worked up enough nerve to come back out.

Now that is a true wienie roast!
i would imagine that you would have to stick the thumb in from behind and holler snake to get the little guy
to stick his head out and look around   :o :o :o

[standles]

Heh watch the LITTLE fellar comments   ;D

[Caneyscud]

I'm wetting myself right not just laughing!

[Quarlow]

I can definitely say that when "Mythbusters" tested this one and busted it they need to revisit it and just pee on the wire themselves. Because it will travel up the stream of pee as they said it wouldn't. Bin there done that!!! and I beleive I still suffer the effects of that mistake when I was 10.

[Tiny Tim]

They did revisit it, but used a chain link fence, and Adam got a small jolt...don't think they had the juice turned up to "normal" though.

[Quarlow]

I must have missed that episode.

[rdevous]

 
Stop...stop...come on guys...at lease type slower...I'm laughing so hard that I can't get my breath...I got tears running down my face from the mental pictures running through my warped mind!!!...finger....yell SNAKE!!!....oh sh*t...now that's funny I don't care who you are...Oh Lord forgive me and all the pygmies in New Guinea..........


Ray
   

[standles]

I guess you ain't cuntry till ya have peed on an electric fence.

Funny how guys have stories of peeing on a variety of things.   

I won't tell the one where to get even withs this guy at work (Loading shack on truck scales) I would pee on his steam heater in winter.

Ewwwww!

[rdevous]

 
A group of 40 years old buddies discuss and discuss where they should meet for dinner.

     
Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen restaurant because the waitress's there have low cut blouses and nice breasts.

     
10 years later, at 50 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss and discuss where they should meet. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because the food there is very good and the wine selection is good also.

     
10 years later at 60 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss and discuss where they should meet. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because they can eat there in peace and quiet and the restaurant is smoke free.

     
10 years later, at 70 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss and discuss where they should meet. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because the restaurant is wheel chair accessible and they even have an elevator.

     
10 years later, at 80 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss and discuss where they should meet. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen because that would be a great idea because they have never been there before.


 
Ray
 

[Wildcat]

1. My parents taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished  cleaning."



2. My parents taught me RELIGION.

"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."



3. My parents taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of   next week!"



4. My parents taught me LOGIC.

"Because I said so, that's why."



5. My parents taught me MORE LOGIC.

"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to  the store with me."



6. My parents taught me FORESIGHT.

"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."



7. My parents taught me IRONY.

"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."



8. My parents taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.

"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."



9. My parents taught me about CONTORTIONISM.

"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"



10.. My parents taught me about STAMINA..

"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."



11. My parents taught me about WEATHER.

"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."



12. My parents taught me about HYPOCRISY.

"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"



13. My parents taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."



14. My parents taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.

"Stop acting like your father!"



15. My parents taught me about ENVY .

"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."



16. My parents taught me about ANTICIPATION.

"Just wait until we get home."



17. My parents taught me about RECEIVING.

"You are going to get it when you get home!"



18. My parents taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.

"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."



19. My parents taught me ESP.

"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"



20. My parents taught me HUMOR.

"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."



21. My parents taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.

"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."



22.. My parents taught me GENETICS.

"You're just like your father."



23. My parents taught me about my ROOTS.

"Shut that door behind you .. Do you think you were born in a barn?"



24. My parents taught me WISDOM.

"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."





And my favorite:





25. My parents taught me about JUSTICE .

"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you."

[Up In Smoke]

Amen Wildcat.....Amen

[cgaengineer]

Ok, Ill bite.

I was talking to a friend this morning and she told me her parents house burned down about a year ago. Well it was the stove pipe that had a hole in it. When the wind blew it pushed sparks into the house and it caught on fire and burned the house to the ground. Well about the only thing left was the wood stove.

The wood stove now sits in their new house! ;D