Funny story of the day

[SiFumar]

[Salmonsmoker]

My Life...

The wife left a note on the fridge:


"It's not working, I can't take it anymore! Gone to stay at my Mother's."


I opened the fridge, the light came on and the beer was cold. I have

no idea what in the hell she was talking about............the fridge works fine.

[beefmann]

My Life...

The wife left a note on the fridge:


"It's not working, I can't take it anymore! Gone to stay at my Mother's."


I opened the fridge, the light came on and the beer was cold. I have

no idea what in the hell she was talking about............the fridge works fine.

such is life,,, never clear messages

[Quarlow]

That's chicks for ya. Go figure.  ;D

[rdevous]

 
Mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a couple nice cold beers.  The day was really quite beautiful, and the brew facilitated some deep thinking on various topics.  Finally I thought about an age old question:  Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts? 
 
Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.  Well, after another beer, and some heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with the answer to that question. 
 
Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby; and here is the reason for my conclusion A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "it might be nice to have another child."  On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts"

I rest my case!

     
Ray
 
 

[Salmonsmoker]

Now that's funny!! ;D ;D

[iceman]

I can now sleep at night because I finally know the answer!  ;D
Good one Ray.

[rdevous]

 
Iceman...One helps where one can...Go forth and toss and turn no more!
 
 
Ray
 
 

[rdevous]

 
Gary and Lou were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as aircraft mechanics in Manchester, NH..
One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.
 
Gary said, 'Man, I wish we had something to drink!' Jim says, 'Me too. Y'know, I've heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz.
 
You wanna try it?'  So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane booze and get completely smashed.  The next morning Lou wakes up and is surprised at how good he feels.  In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects.  Nothing!
 
Then the phone rings. It's Gary. Gary says, 'Hey, how do you feel this morning?'
 
Lou says, 'I feel great, how about you?'
 
Gary says, 'I feel great, too. You don't have a hangover?' Lou says, 'No that jet fuel is great stuff -- no hangover, nothing. We ought to do this more often..'
 
'Yeah, well there's just one thing.'
 
'What's that?'
   
'Have you farted yet?'
 
'No.'
 
'Well, DON'T - cause I'm in Boston'
 
 
Ray
 
 

[Wildcat]

Check out this cute commercial: http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?feature=player_embedded&v=341rybZ42vA

[SiFumar]

So I'm at Wal-Mart buying a bag of Purina dog food for my dog. While in the check-out line, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT??? So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again, and that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Better watch what you ask me and be prepared for my answer. I have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.

[rdevous]

 
Ever walk into a room with some purpose in mind, only to completely forget what that purpose was?   :-\
 
Turns out, doors themselves are to blame for these strange memory lapses.

Psychologists at the University of Notre Dame have discovered that passing through a doorway triggers what's known as an event boundary in the mind, separating one set of thoughts and memories from the next.
   
Your brain files away the thoughts you had in the previous room and prepares a blank slate for the new locale.
 
It's not aging, it's the damn door!    >:(
 
Whew!  Thank goodness for studies  8)

[3rensho]

Oh yeah, glad to know what it is  ;D ;D  Thought it was old-timers disease.

[GusRobin]

Oh yeah, glad to know what it is  ;D ;D  Thought it was old-timers disease.

I call it "sometimers" --as in sometimes I can't remember

[Wildcat]

http://images.businessweek.com/ss/05/11/egreetings/image/01.swf